Old 06-03-2007   #1 (permalink)
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How To Beat Someone Up Over The Internet

This is actually my first text based tutorial (I usually do video podcasts, but I don't think it's required for this). Before I continue, do remember, this is a novelty thread. No people were harmed and no animals were tortured during the making of this guide.

A number of people have asked how to quickly 'beat someone’s pic up'. So here's a quick tutorial on how to do so. Feel free to practise with this picture, as the owner asked me to mess with it some more on another thread - so here's a 'How To Guide' to bust up a pic quickly and with ease.



This is a text based tutorial aimed at novice-intermediate users, so it should be quite straight forward to follow for almost everyone.

Step One: Target Your Victim
First up, grab your victim and throw him into Photoshop. Upon doing so, grab your weapon, which in this case I go straight in with the 'Curves' to quickly add some depth to the poor quality photograph.

Step Two: Facial Rearrangement
Now to just go in for the kill and open up 'Liquify'. Take a brief second to scan over your victims face and pinpoint his features...then rearrange his face to your satisfaction. The two tools I used to ruff up this photo is the 'Forward Warp' and 'Bloat' options. These two tools are very easily setup and adjusted for fast and smooth online facial surgery. After quickly playing around until you're happy with the basic facial rearranging go back into the standard options window.

Step Three: Facial Injuries
At this moment, your victim should look quite strange and freakish as though you've just laid into him with a spade, or other blunt object. Now you want to add some fast facial injuries. In the example photo, I'm not looking to kill or cause much physical harm, so I went for an extreme bruising effect. To get this effect nice and quickly, just grab your 'Dodge' and 'Burn' tools. Aim around the bone structure of your victim. The eyes sockets of the skull, the forehead, the cheek bone and jaw being the most favourable in your typical blunt object facial destruction process. Gently apply the bruising with a stroking movement as though you're smoothing out the skin with a sledgehammer.

Step Four: Cleaning Up The Mess
As you finish off bruising your victims face, your assault should look almost complete. You may need to edit the background of your image if you went overboard with the 'Liquify' tool. In this photographic case, the victim is placed in front of an ocean horizon. This makes blending the foreground, victim and background together quite easy. You can do this by using the 'Rectangular Marquee' and selecting the horizon at each side of the victims body, then copying the selection and pasting it above the edited victims layer. Now you can use the 'Move' tool to line up any distorted areas you previous created mashing this guy’s face. If you need to retouch the image more, you can blend the images using the 'Healing Brush' in combination with 'Dodge' and 'Burn', or 'Smudge' and layer opacity adjustments if required.

Step Five: Cosmetic Surgery
After you've touched up any noticeable errors, add a little bit more detail. In this example, I made my victims two front teeth larger to resemble your stereotypical 'geek', or 'dork'. To do this, it's very simple and the process is fast - which is what we're striving for in this tutorial - pure speed - hit and run style. All you need to do is zoom in close, take a selection of the two front teeth using either the 'Rectangular Marquee', or the 'Pen' tool - depending on your preference, or mood, in making your victim look as mangled and as geeky as you desire.

Conclusion
Once mastered, this process should take no longer than a couple of minutes and the outcomes can be quite humorous and varied.

If you want to actually spend some time on a project like this, all it takes is some playing around with advanced blending, photo manipulation and selection techniques.

If there is much demand in this basic tutorial, I may consider doing an advanced video tutorial in my next session to highlight how to get a more detailed outcome from your online sackbeatings.

The moral of this tutorial is - don't mess with Zapp Brannigan and his crew! We have e-crowbars and e-chainsaws. Play nice boys and girls. I hope your enjoyed this basic tutorial and it helped you in some way on your crusade to get a quick outcome from your victim’s photographs and is a helpful novelty guide on 'How To Beat Someone Up Over The Internet'.

Disclaimer- This thread is for information purposes only. Nobody was hurt during the making of this tutorial and was created for fun only. If anyone requires an image walk-through of this guide let me know and it can be arranged at a later date.
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Old 06-03-2007   #2 (permalink)
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Now that's what I'm talking about. Put your money where your mouth is. I am proud to say that I was instrumental in getting you off your ass and actually doing something CREATIVE . All the worthless bull**** you have posted in the past is forgiven. Now you may consider yourself a valued and respected member of the Biorust community. Welcome friend
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Old 06-03-2007   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kokopedal View Post
Now that's what I'm talking about. Put your money where your mouth is. I am proud to say that I was instrumental in getting you off your ass and actually doing something CREATIVE . All the worthless bull**** you have posted in the past is forgiven. Now you may consider yourself a valued and respected member of the Biorust community. Welcome friend
I've made various worthwhile threads and contributions in the past on my old accounts. All you did on the community project thread was spam it and try to take it offtopic. I think it's time YOU actually started doing something CREATIVE instead of spamming other threads with 'worthless bull****'

Consider this thread a lesson. I hope you learn from it.
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Old 06-03-2007   #4 (permalink)
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Sounds fun to me

I do thinks this should be posted in the tuturial section, but that's just me
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Old 06-03-2007   #5 (permalink)
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Kif told me that it would be a waste of time for me to extend my hand in friendship. I am inclined to belive that he was correct, however I am offering you my hand one more time. Please accept my (final) offer.
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Old 06-03-2007   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by unleash View Post
Sounds fun to me

I do thinks this should be posted in the tuturial section, but that's just me
haha yeah. The Zapper posted it in the wrong area.

I personally don't think it's Tutorial material as it is. Maybe if I get around doing a more detailed guide with some screenshots of the exact settings I used.

Quote:
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Kif told me that it would be a waste of time for me to extend my hand in friendship. I am inclined to belive that he was correct, however I am offering you my hand one more time. Please accept my (final) offer.
I don't dislike you, I've read a few of your earlier posts and you seem like an okay guy. I just don't take crap from people who pull my chain. Never have - never will

Some would say that's one of my strong points, some would say that's one of my weakest points. It all depends how you judge a persons attitude and character.
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Old 06-04-2007   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zapp Brannigan View Post
I personally don't think it's Tutorial material as it is. Maybe if I get around doing a more detailed guide with some screenshots of the exact settings I used.
*cough* Improve it a little and pop it on the wiki *cough*
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Old 06-05-2007   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Man1c M0g View Post
*cough* Improve it a little and pop it on the wiki *cough*
Thanks for the encouragement. But due to forum trolls spamming threads and generally turning their noses up at everything I tried to do for the community with previous threads, I feel even more spam will head my way. For the good of the Bio-Wiki and keeping it free from trolling I think it's for the best if I don't post it. There's a certain bunch who may attempt to hijack it and it would not look good for the project, which I think is a great idea.

What can I say, some people don't like my attitude and people who stand up for themselves and what they believe in. I used to really enjoy the community here a couple of years ago when I posted on my old accounts, but people change and not everyone is going to get on with everyone else. So I think for the sake of those trolls and spammers, it's time I moved on. The forum doesn't need something like that.

I'll take this opportunity to say good luck with BioRUST, you have my respect for sticking at it for so long.
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Old 06-07-2007   #9 (permalink)
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I guess that porbably is a rock into my garden... But oh well.Altough i don't like getting called a "troll" i don't really mind.
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